GF salary Vs. My salary

Just a suggestion: You could very politely ask her to pay the dining bills (especially when with friends). She could probably understand the value of money then. Because, communication is the first thing one can do. Secondly, if she refuses to and communication makes her sick and she is unable to understand your whole pov then I am sorry you have to rethink about the whole togetherness. Because, I am not sure if you'll be happy throughout life with this area of disagreement.

Get married. Fir tumhari salary bhi uski ho jayegi🌝

If being with a hardworking person like him,she didn't learn anything then later also she will not. Being a girl I wanted a person like him who wants to help me learn and upgrade myself but never got anyone for guidance. Lucky she is .

Bro I appreciate your achievements but, wr u r living in this generation, go and ask all types of suggestions to deep seek or chat Gpt it's better' then asking in public.

I have been in similar situations. And i have seen the situations get worse. It's better to move on. The thing she, has gotten the hang of is that you will grow and she doesn't want to and you take all the financial responsibility. And at the end will stop you from sending any money to family and even she will not let you take care of your parents. She will want to just take care of her parents. Bro just move on... This will be the hardest decision but safe and good for you.

As a man it is our responsibility to provide and as a female she should play the supporting role. I can understand your point clearly but from a female perspective she want you to lead and if she reaches your level she may lose respect for you and again you have to be on your toes to justify your worth which will be challenging for you. If you both are happy together better not to ask much but yeah if she is demanding more than she deserves better to explain her the scenario in a polite manner. She may be thinking of leaving the job after you guys get married. Just talk and state your expectations clearly. If you guys have good bonding things will sort out for good.😊

Dude you are screwed. You will never get out of it. If you leave, several fir will get registered. She will not stop unless you are done and dusted

List all the pain points in the relationship and perform a MoSCoW analysis (Must have, Should have, Could have, and Won't have). If the number of pain points categorized as 'Could have' and 'Won’t have' exceed those in 'Must have' and 'Should have,' initiate a breakup conversation. Alternatively, assign scores based on the severity or importance of each pain point. If the cumulative score of non-critical issues outweighs the critical ones, use that as a basis for making a breakup decision

1. Set a boundary: From now on, I’ll only split essentials fairly, no more covering extras. It’s not anger, it’s balance. 2. Offer a choice, not pressure: I love you and want us to grow. I’ll support you if you want to upgrade, but if not, we may be on different paths. 3. Choose clarity over comfort: If she stays passive, she’ll hold you back.. That’s not love , that’s emotional baggage. To sum it: You’re growing fast; she’s comfortable staying still. That mismatch isn’t just financial , it’s values.. If she won’t grow with you, you’ll have to outgrow her.. Love isn’t enough without alignment. Either she steps up, or you move on.. All the best!!

Jis din uska package tumse jyada ho gya , to fhr life partner upgrade krdegi !

Have a serious chat.

If you can't change the girl.... change the girl...

Brother she don't need motivation....you need therapy!

Bhai, It's not just about money bro. You're feeling unseen and unsupported that's the bigger issue. Ask yourself, is this what you want long-term?

I don’t feel there is anything wrong honestly husband and wife also contribute unequally its about what u bring on the table housewife also do spend a lot living off their husbands so ? Dunno to me its feels ok honestly u can not pay thats your choice for her cafe bills tell her nahi hai simple if she is not willing to grow

एक और भाई का कट गया। वैसे आदमी बना ही गिवर है भाई... तुम गर्लफ्रेंड/बीवी पे उड़ाओ, बाद में बच्चे पे। शादी न किये और सिंगल हो तो दोस्त दारू पियेंगे मुफ्त की या उधार लेंगे कभी नही लौटाने। लेकिन ये सब भी तब हो पायेगा जब पेरेंट्स को हेल्थ इश्यू नही है, या पेरेंट्स अपने हेल्थ की व्यवस्था खुद कर रखे है... बहुत खर्च होता इसमें। अगर सब कुछ सही है तो प्रोपर्टी में डालोगे, घर लोगे, और अंत तक ईएमाई भरोगे... फैमिली के लिये (क्योंकि खुद तो अपन 6000 के पीजी में भी ऐश से रह लेते है पर फैमली के लिए अच्छा चाहिए।) तो ओवरऑल आदमी अपने लिए वैसे भी नही कमाता है। तो टेंसन मत लो। अगर कोई भी नही लेता तुमसे तो तुम खूद अनाथाश्रम या वृद्धाश्रम में दान करते देर सबेर। ऐसा ही है आदमी जात।

What is your YOE and domain?

She is not repecting you and taking you for granted. Now its your call how to deal with it by telling her the consequences of it.

It's great that you're thinking about how to address this issue in your relationship. Here are some suggestions: 1. *Open Communication*: Have an honest conversation with your girlfriend about your concerns and feelings. Explain how you feel about the financial imbalance and how it's affecting your relationship. 2. *Understand Her Perspective*: Try to understand why she's not motivated to increase her earnings. Is she happy with her current job? Does she have other priorities? Listen to her perspective and see if there's a middle ground. 3. *Set Financial Goals Together*: Discuss and set financial goals together, including saving, investing, and expenses. This can help you both be on the same page and work towards common objectives. 4. *Support and Encouragement*: Instead of just telling her to work harder, offer specific support and encouragement. For example, you could help her find online courses or study materials, or offer to study together. 5. *Re-evaluate Expense Sharing*: Consider revising your expense-sharing arrangement to better reflect your income disparity. You could explore alternative arrangements, like proportional splitting of expenses. 6. *Career Development*: If she's interested in advancing her career, you could help her explore opportunities, networking, or mentorship. Remember, relationships involve compromise and understanding. Approach the conversation with empathy and an open mind.

See, I am a woman, and I always try to go 50-50 with the guy I date. If I am dating someone rich, if we go out, I will bear the small costs, and if he wants to go to fancy restaurants, I will try to split the bill, or he will pay. Obviously she should upgrade her skills to reach higher levels, not for the fancy cafes but for her own identity and confidence. But you, sir, have to realize that if you go out with friends, you only have to pay for her and yourself. The others can sort themselves out. As a man, it is your responsibility to look after her and yourself if the restaurant is fancy. Other bills she can split too if they are not from fancy places. Your being genuinely concerned for her career is good, but it is your fault too if you pay for her friends. And have a conversation with her, saying, 'I think we should save more and cut down on the collective expenses.' Don't blame her that she needs to cut down on her expenses. Since you are also living in without a proper commitment and she is acting like a wife too, it is your responsibility to include the terms "we" and "us" instead of using singular pronouns. Cut down on your outings too. If you go out with your friends and spend money there but call her out as well, then that's on you. Think about it. If she loves you, she will be happy that you did not attack her and considered you guys as a unit while mentioning the expenses. She will cut down on them. In a partnership, everything needs to be shared, so you cannot be completely selfish about money. Be prudent, but if the roles were reversed, I am sure that she would have paid for you as well. I have too. You said she isn't a miser in your previous comments too. Sabka hisaab nahi rakhna chahiye. If, suppose on a weekend trip, you both decide on a lavish resort, and if she were the one earning more, and no matter how much ever you try, you cannot get to her level, I am sure she would have paid for you too. In a partnership, you have to think for both. I earn more than my partner, but if he loves something, I always say, Ki ye humara paisa hain, and he will also be considerate and spend wisely. But never blame and single that person out. I think you are not quite there in the marriage mindset, but jab tum aaoge tab pata chalega. But if you speak to Abhi in anger, the relationship will end, and years later, when you get the maturity, then you might regret losing out on a loved one. But you're a good guy who wants the best for your partner. So cheers, and don't pay for her friends.

when out with friends, initially itself suggest to dutch.. never know if her fiernds are in on this little scam. else m suggestions that things wont work out this way so that she starts to get more serious abt her life.. good luck

Honestly, I want to share some thoughts based on what you’ve said. You mentioned being concerned about her current salary package—₹8 lakhs per annum—and that you’re already worried about it even before a serious commitment. That raises a bigger concern for me. Let’s flip the situation: Imagine she had a ₹40 lakh package, significantly higher than yours, and then a year into your marriage, she lost her job and went through a tough phase in her career. Would you be emotionally supportive in that scenario too? That’s what really matters in a long-term relationship—emotional support during highs and lows—not just the number on a payslip. From your post, it comes across that you’re very focused on salary progression. You’ve done well for yourself—from 2020 to 2025, you’ve increased your earnings 4x, which is commendable. But such rapid jumps can sometimes backfire. I’ve seen people in metro cities earn high packages only to be laid off, then forced to accept jobs paying much less—sometimes even ₹20-30k—in entirely different locations. It’s not always about how high your salary is in a short span; it’s about long-term stability and consistent growth. HR teams and recruiters do notice erratic job changes and package jumps, and that can make future hiring decisions tougher. You said you’re ready to support her studies, which is great. But at the same time, you’re struggling to accept her being content with her current package. That feels contradictory. It’s actually a strength to have a partner who knows what satisfaction looks like, someone who doesn’t constantly chase more. As for her social circle—yes, having open conversations about boundaries and expectations with friends is important. But once married, her priorities will shift too. These things evolve with time. What matters is honest communication between the two of you. Finally, if you’re serious about building a life with her, you’ll need to respect her choices—just as you want yours to be respected. Chasing salary hikes job after job without a long-term view can be risky, not just for your own career but also for your shared future. All of this is shared with the assumption that your total experience is about five years. I haven’t factored in your personal expenses or financial goals, just focusing on the emotional and professional balance needed in a long-term partnership. Stay happy and blessed!!!

Maybe she's in her comfort zone but try to clearly talk to her, if you both understand it's okay to go ahead but if she's showing tantrums and drama it's not okay, and plus thing is that you not fine with it some men are okay with this things so she's not for you that's it

I think you should set a strict budget for yourself first, Build your bacis 1. Have 6 months emergency funds Emergency fund is the monthly expenses for 6 months Ex- your monthly expense is 50k per month Then keep 3lakhs aside as fd for emergency like Covid, or job loss or something Have all the insurance for you and your dependent parents or siblings if any And then try not to cross your monthly budget You have to limit your expenses She needs to feel the need to earn more, Then only she can upgrade and ask her to plan her budget as well for emergency times, this is the basic for anyone and everyone

Kid let me tell you something, if you truly loved her. You would never, I repeat you would NEVER ever bring this up to public to strangers like us to get advise on your hatred rant on gf not working hard enough. As a man as a provider we die and get stressed to earn more and more but if she has reached from 3 LPA to 8 LPA in 5 years then there must be a reason for it. She is probably not a coder like you and general jobs don't pay like an software engineer get. That's why for you 5 LPA was start while her was 3LPA. She has her own pace and life. Don't be a dominant piece of crap and end up ruining the relation. 5 years is a long time. And you are talking about splitting expenses? You are earning way more than her so naturally and obviously you are suppose to give bigger chunk of contribution than her. Your plate is overloaded while her is having one piece. Understand the situation first and seriously grow up. As a human and in relation as well

Perfect One.. My suggestion is.. Ask her to earn minimum 12 LPA.. Which can support you..

Firstly, live separately and ignore her.

It's her choice

My view is different, Its been 5 years, enough time for you to know her and be sure that you actually love her. I feel if you actually love her then her earning should not be any problem, there are literally crores of housewives and there marriage is perfectly fine. The question you should ask yourself is, did you love her or did you love the idea of havind dual income?

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Next time, while going to cafe or restaurant with her friends... In last moment tell her that " I can't come " Tell some excuse... This makes her realise your value and your money tooo

There are two ways to look at it. 1. Why are you as an individual spending money on things where you don't want it to go or it is not necessary? 2. Why do you think growth in career is that urgent for her? What does earning enough for myself means to her? Money in relationships is rarely just about numbers. It's often a proxy for deeper issues like: You feel that the current arrangement is unfair, especially when you're covering discretionary expenses that benefit her social life. You might feel unappreciated for your efforts to provide or for your willingness to support her growth. Your drive for a higher income likely stems from a desire for greater financial security and the ability to achieve shared future goals (e.g., buying a home, travel, starting a family). Her comfort with less might indicate a different level of concern for these future aspirations. While you might not intend it, paying for more can inadvertently create a power imbalance, and her resistance to earning more could be a subtle way of maintaining a sense of independence or avoiding perceived pressure. Since you both are almost 27 years old, I think you have seen good amount of your friends growing, so if even after seeing u grow or her friends grow , she does not have that kindle in her. This indicates that either she is not skilled for a switch or underconfident or have some other growth path. If underconfident you can't do things to make her feel confident, it will come thru her own efforts, share responsibilities with her with this she might feel she need more and start working on her own. To come out of comfort zone requires a good amount of push or motivation. If you are not able to help her gain motivation, then tell her to read books on financial freedom, ask about her goals, does she have an idea that she wants to do business in or any other activity which she is good at or want to be, if then discuss about it and start working with her. Now what if she doesn't want to run that fast, let her live a life of her own pace and curtail your expenses by avoiding outside food and eating a healthy and balanced diet together. This will automatically cut down your expenses and instead of going to cafes inviting your friends at home would create a better conversation and private space. Even after all that she doesn't want to grow not in money but in habits, food choices and conversations about her goals. You can stay with her but then you have to run faster than before,this is in long run would be exhaustive. I think a logical conversation may make things better. Lets talk in financial conditions... Sit down and map out all your shared expenses and discretionary spending. This can often highlight where money is going and prompt a more realistic discussion. Then divide the spendings proportionally. If she denies it or is not interested, Earn more yourself(If you are not thinking for a breakup) This would be tough for you as it will not help her grow but you too not in financial aspects but in understanding urself too. Finally if everything doesn't work it means your values, aspirations and need to change for each other is under compromised. Hope it helps

She is not ambitious clearly. Talk about it. See if it works. If not LOSE HER

Typical genZ naivete. That woman is just using you like a temporary bodyguard cum useful escort to parties cum personal entertainer and waiting to land a rich shark for marriage. Girls are pretty clear about these things. It's the boys who grow up after such trauma and some go into depression after that. However, if you suddenly become a rich dude by say, landing a dream job abroad earning in dollars then she might seek marriage with you. If you now breakup she might file false rape complaints against you and harrass you legally. Anyway, you seem to be butchered soon. No sympathies for your stupidity.

You are lucky, just continue blindly. This Relationship is not about equal share, you are getting lot for what you would have paid much more. Women should be protected. Don’t cheat her and marry her. And take responsibility, this is the part of life. All the best!!

Bro, it’s okay for a woman to be financially dependent on you not every relationship needs to be 50-50 money. But ask yourself the deeper question: If one day you stop earning, will she stand up for you? Will she save for you, make sacrifices be it emotional, lifestyle, or effort-driven for the life you're building together? Right now, she seems settled in her comfort zone while you’re constantly pushing to grow which is okay as long as she is there for you and thinks about you and respects you. Relationships aren’t just about love they’re about support, and shared values. You need a partner who may depend on you, yes but also invests in the future with you. Think long-term.

Bro…! Leave her, that’s all I can see for near future!

Like most of the men in relationships and marriages - tera kat rahi h bhai wo... Big time. Tu uska lifestyle maintain karne ka ATM h aur kuch nhi. Aage Jake ye aur badega. Thoda sakt launda bano aur ek plan banao, sidha discussion se kuch kam nhi hota ladkiyo ke saath. Bolo ghar me, ya fir aur kahipe kuch bada kharcha aa gya, ek bada loan lena pad raha h, and a big chunk of your salary will go into that. Plus you have to increase investment at the same time as you have decided that you want to retire early, ye stress ki zindegi zyada din nhi continue kar paoge. Aisa kuch plan banao, and see your well being is a concerning matter for her or not. If yes, she will have to stop this, if no, well bro, welcome to reality.

What do you do? Are both the same title and role?

Bro start looking for a new flat and move there happily . No explanation needed just fking break up

See, I am a woman, and I always try to go 50-50 with the guy I date. If I am dating someone rich, if we go out, I will bear the small costs, and if he wants to go to fancy restaurants, I will try to split the bill, or he will pay. Obviously she should upgrade her skills to reach higher levels, not for the fancy cafes but for her own identity and confidence. But you, sir, have to realize that if you go out with friends, you only have to pay for her and yourself. The others can sort themselves out. As a man, it is your responsibility to look after her and yourself if the restaurant is fancy. Other bills she can split too if they are not from fancy places. Your being genuinely concerned for her career is good, but it is your fault too if you pay for her friends. And have a conversation with her, saying, 'I think we should save more and cut down on the collective expenses.' Don't blame her that she needs to cut down on her expenses. Since you are also living in without a proper commitment and she is acting like a wife too, it is your responsibility to include the terms "we" and "us" instead of using singular pronouns. Cut down on your outings too. If you go out with your friends and spend money there but call her out as well then that's on you. Think about it. If she loves you she will be happy that you did not attack her and considered you guys as a unit while mentioning the expenses. She will cut down on them. In a partnership, everything needs to be shared then you csnnot be completely selfish about money. Be prudent but if the roles were reversed, I am sure that she would have paid for you as well. I have too. You said she isn't a miser in your previous comments too. Sabka hisaab nahi rakhna chahiye. If suppose on a weekend trip you both decide on a lavish resort and if she were the one earning more and no matter how much ever you try you cannot get to her level, I am sure she would have paid for you too. In a partnership you have to think for both. I earn more than my partner btu if he loves something I always say ki ye humara paisa hain, and he will also be considerate and spend wisely. But never blame and single that person out. I think you are not quite there in the marriage mindset but jab tum aaoge tab pata chalega. But abhi gusse se bologe toh the relationship will end and years later when you get the maturity then you might regret on losing out a loved one. But you're a good guy who wants to best for your parnter. SO cheers and don't pay for her friends.

Why forcing her to earn more ....your there to take care of her ...so that is all ok...after all you are also earning for her only ....just consider her earning as saving...

She is in her comfort zone

You just stop taking care of her then she will know your value and value of money, then she will focus on her career

Reminds me of pyar ka punchnama 2

Bhai ese se to better hai jo kuch bhi na kama Rahi ho...😛

see it postive: 1. Her job is less stressfull comapred to your's - good for relationship 2. Make her wife give her wife role with IT work. 3. Do not ask here to earn more you should as a man - if you both where in jungle will you ask her to hunt? 4. In real life trust me there is no happy couple when both work in IT -- most end up in sepration :p 5. why are you not upscaling yourself and make up for both - you think 22lpa is dead end ? 6. She loves you, trusts you that you will work hard for both of them - congrats that's how a normal women as human should think totally perfect

Bhai tu suside kar aur apni saari estate usi ko de ..bahot padha Maine tuze kisi ka sunana nahi hai tu q aaya hai idhar .. kuch kaam ki baat karo ..satyanash kar dete hai tumhare jaise like hue anpadh. Jam se kam jo app me chat kar rahe ho uska toh apmaan mat karo yeh social media nahi hai jo apne dukhade ro raha hai. This is ambition box idhar log jo. Ke baare discuss karne aate hai baaki personal life. If you can't cope with the situation better find some other platform. Cos sabke life ka question paper same nahi hota aur answesheet.

@a senior executive bro, there's limit to being giving in a relationship and I think she has hit that limit otherwise you would not have been asking for anonymous suggestions. Please note 5 years is nothing to know a woman. It's nothing. Now a test is needed for your relationship. If you don't want to do all that natak mentioned above, go ahead and have a heart to heart with her. Discuss about future, tell her that you wanted to cut down all that cost and invest it for a long time, and she herself needs to upgrade. It's needed for both of yours future. Also, keep some leeway for like a few smal trips and a big trip in a year.... In the process, keep your stand strong. If she sees a future with you, she will have to understand. 5 years is a long time. Time to plan for future. Fun time is almost over.

What is your tech stack and which co is giving 22 within 5 yrs

If you both really love each other, get married and live with your parents for some time, then all the expenses will automatically reduce and if she is not ready to live with her parents, then end the relationship here, this is my honest advice to you. She is only with you for the money.

Bro, don't Pressure your life partner. Hard work is a good thing but too much pressure will be a headache for life. So, target a plan what you want to achieve, then excute the plan together accordingly in a smart way.

Bro...I feel like both of you are doing great only...with both of your salary you can run a family which can be easily termed as of above average standards of not rich.so why pushing her for more and more...why you are so particular about her earning.

Discuss this issue with her calmly. Even if she doesn't listen afterward, you will have to make a tough decision.

thats i never share your true income with anyone

🚩

Leave her

Get married

Scam 2025

That's True.